I open the refrigerator

I open the refrigerator

and pull out my phone like a prayer.

Same question in the blue square:

how to tell if eggs are good?

I've read the float test before,

I've read the sniff test before,

I've forgotten both

in the space between then and now.

I could crack one open.

I could trust my own eyes.

But I'm standing here

in the fluorescent light,

asking the same question to the same site,

watching the same answers appear.

What else do I lose?

What else fades away

that leaves me reaching for the blue

again and again?

The eggs don't change.

The search bar doesn't change.

Only I change—

forgetting, remembering, forgetting again,

a person who has to keep asking

the same dumb question

to the same blue light,

over and over,

like I'm the only one

who can't seem to hold

the smallest things.